Oops, I did it again....

Got cancelled that is.... go figure. I knew it was coming, but that doesn't make it any easier to deal with. Went to see the doc this AM, and my cysts have resolved, and I have no lining, but she isn't sure why I haven't had a period, but she said that I was right with my math, and that there was no way that we would get in an IVF before the end of the year!!! I hate MATH!!! So this is the plan, 42days, yeah I said 42 days of BCP's. Crap I thought I was having a long road the last time, but this is gonna do me in!!! I have to take them for 6 weeks straight, no sugar pills, just the BCP's, and then we will go from there. I have to call and get the new schedual from the IVF nurse so that I know when I can start with this next cycle so that when the lab opens again I will be ready!!! I am sitting here having a glass of wine, and wishing I had a cigarette!!! Oh I tell you that has been something that has been on my back all freaking day. When I get bad news I smoke or eat, that is how I am. Since I can't eat because of the BCP's making me so sick, the smokes are the thing I am craving the most!! God, give me the strength not to do it!!!

Well I am gonna go for the night, I need to sleep....